Handing a screenplay to someone and telling them
it’s a comedy is easy.
Making them laugh as they read it is an entirely
different kind of flying altogether.
The word “funny” has a lot of different
interpretations, but in the filmmaking profession, the word funny only means
one thing: causing an audience to
laugh. If your character’s joke doesn’t
cause a script reader to laugh, your joke is not funny. If your piefight/carchase sequence with the
John Belushi robot doesn’t keep a script reader in stitches with every line,
your piefight/carchase sequence with the John Belushi robot is not funny.
Bottom line: If your script doesn’t cause an
audience to laugh, it’s not funny.
If you want your script to be worthy of the
description “comedy screenplay,” then take a minute, Chachi, and apply a few of
my quick philosophies/cantrips below to make sure your comedy is actually uh,
you know, making people laugh.
Your comedy script’s laughs aren’t rooted in the
unexpected
Here’s a joke for you:
Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says “Why the long face?”
Funny?
Sure, 50 years ago when it was first told.
Funny now?
Probably not.
So let’s fix it:
Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says “Why the long face?”
Horse says “I’ve got AIDS.”
If you laughed, you’re sick, yes, but hey, you
laughed.
The reason you laughed? Aside from being completely offensive and
non-politically correct, it’s a reversal; a surprise.
To wit, every good joke is rooted in surprise.
In this case, the punchline is completely
unexpected, because you brought that first, original horse joke in with
you. And that original is a joke you’ve
heard a million times, so the “AIDS” reveal, while not terribly PC or nice,
flipped it on its head, triggering your primate brain to laugh, for reasons
only evolutionary biologists and fundamentalist Christians understand.
Assignment: Seek and destroy any jokes in your
script that are pat, overused, unfunny, or have no element of surprise to them.
Your comedy script’s jokes rely too heavily on
references
But alas, while the “horse with AIDS” joke worked
due to the audience member bringing in the original horse joke with them, good
comedy doesn’t rely on that being the case 100% of the time.
Audiences, readers of your script, moviegoers –
the onus isn’t on them to “get” what you’re talking about, or to “get” the
references your comedy is leaning on. The best comedy is self-contained, and
the best comics and comedy writers know that a punchline is only as strong as
its setup, one that brings everybody in on the reference, so to speak.
In other words, the only comedy that makes
non-imbeciles laugh is the kind that doesn’t rely on them “getting the
joke.” It’s your responsibility to make
audiences laugh, no matter how many times, if any, the audience has seen Monty Python and The Holy Grail or all those
rad Francis videos on YouTube.
Assignment: Scan through your script and find
jokes or comedic moments that rely too heavily on the audience knowing
something specific; something perhaps you haven’t provided. Tweak those jokes’ setups, whether the setup
is in the joke itself, or comes earlier in the script, to make the reference
“gettable” by everyone reading your script.
Your
comedy script overuses clichés and tropes
Perhaps inaccurately, the word “trope” has come to
be rather synonymous with the word “cliché,” at least in the screenwriting
space. For our intents and purposes,
we’ll define “trope” as “a commonly overused literary device.”
A spit take, for example, is a trope, verbal
backpedaling is a trope, the annoying laugh (e.g. Chrissy’s snort in the TV
series Three’s Company), is a trope.
Comedy that relies on cliché and/or tropes usually
gets far fewer laughs than comedy that takes the time to turn those clichés on
their heads, or to customize them in some way as to make them surprising or
fresh.
Assignment: Hunt down your clichés. If you can’t remove them or craft them more
originally or comedically, at least tweak them to be less glaringly unoriginal.
You haven’t measured your comedy script’s LPP
(Laughs Per Page)
A script aspiring to the description “comedy” owes
the audience at least one major thing:
laughter.
But if your pages don’t have laughs, you might be
failing, (or you might be making Sophie’s Choice.)
Do this:
Count how many times you laugh, per page, and write the number down at
the bottom of each page. Then add up the
script’s total laugh count. Divide by
how many pages you have. Now multiply
that by 10. Add 5. Subtract 30, and you
have your birth age.
Seriously comedically though, if you’re not at a
laugh per page, minimum, your script is probably not funny.
When counting the laughs, make sure they’re
laugh-out-loud moments as well, not “Oh, that’s cute,” moments. For a laugh to count as a laugh, it needs to
actually, you know, make you laugh.
When you’re done, ask a friend to do the same, and
compare numbers. (I’ll bet her count is
way lower than yours.)
Pin that number to your wall and focus on it. It needs to go up. Ever up.
Always, always up. The amount of
laughter in a comedy makes the difference between a movie like Airplane! and a
movie like Employee of The Month.
All that being said, all good musical compositions
have rests, and so should laughter. So
feel free to dole out laughs in measured doses, complete with periods of
non-laughter. There’s nothing wrong with
one or two pages going by without a laugh.
In fact, I’ll bet you got through this entire page without laughing
once. Jerk.
Your
comedy script is flat-out not funny (Sorry!)
Some people are funny, and well, frankly, some
people just shop at Vons.
If you’re truly interested in writing comedy,
you’ve got to tear open your shirt and let people stab you.
If you don’t know if you’re not funny, ask your
friends and family, ask professionals, and ask them to be honest.
And then go watch George Carlin, Imogene Coca,
Phyllis Diller, Sid Caesar, Gilda Radner, Mel Brooks, Richard Pryor, Bill
Hicks, Rodney Dangerfield, and Peter Sellers.
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